A Guide to Holding Space: Trip-Sitting with Compassion & Intention
So, your best friend is planning to do psilocybin mushrooms for the first time and they asked if you'd trip sit them. Or perhaps, you're at a festival, and you find someone having a difficult psychedelic experience—how do you hold space for them on the fly?
Indeed, outside the context of clinical psychedelic-assisted therapy and scientific trials is where the majority of psychedelic use actually occurs. Not all this usage is supervised, and not all of it is done with intention or preparation. That said, if you spend enough time in a psychedelic community, you may very well come across an opportunity to help someone along on their journey—whether because they asked you to do so ahead of time, or because you just happened to be there at the time and place when they needed support.
Note that there is a big difference between psychedelic therapy and trip sitting. For starters, the latter is very specifically not therapy. As the space holder, trip sitter, facilitator, medicine server, or even shaman—whatever you call this particular role—it does not require a therapeutic degree and therefore does not necessarily entail therapeutic action. In fact, doing so, attempting to do so without the proper licensing or training, could actually be risky for the journeyer.
Holding space—to use the most neutral term—at its core is about fostering a safe, compassionate environment for a person who is experiencing altered consciousness to journey that state with as much ease as possible. To that end, the space holder must serve as a grounding presence, offering a container in which the journeyer can navigate their inner landscape with courage and grace. It's about witnessing, honoring, and trusting the process and the person's own inner wisdom and healer. It is not about healing a person. It is not about imposing your view or answering every question they ask. In fact, as one space holder once joked, the best trip sitter is in the other room. In other words, simply hold the space while simultaneously decentering yourself. There are no shoulds, just best practices to increase harm reduction and benefit optimization. Offer them water, write down any epiphanies they may state outloud, and remind them that you're there if they need a hand. Simply put: Sit, don't guide.
Preparation Questions
If someone comes to you and asks you to tripsit them, consider asking the following questions to ensure that it is safe for them to trip, and that they are doing so with intentions:
1) Have you ever been suicidal or suffer from panic attacks? If the answer is yes, they may want to stay away from psychedelics or find a licensed therapist to work with instead of just a trip sitter.
2) Are you on SSRIs or other medications? And do you have any physical or mental health conditions that may contraindicate with the psychedelic experience? If the answer to any of these questions is yes, consider guiding them to someone like Ben Malcolm, a.k.a. The Spirit Pharmacist, to ensure that it is safe for them to do whatever substance they are considering, in light of their medical and mental health history.
3) What are your intentions for the journey? What are they hoping to explore, to understand, to heal?
4) Do you have any concerns or fears about this endeavor? Is there anything that makes you anxious or nervous?
5) What kind of support do you need from me? Do you just want my presence? Do you want to talk out your experience while you're under the influence? Would you want physical touch and if so, what kind? A holding hand, a hug?
6) Have you done this substance before or another psychedelic substance? If so, what was your experience like?
7) Are you currently in therapy? Who is your support system?
8) What kind of music would you like to listen to during your trip? Is there any way that I can make the environment most comfortable for you?
9) What snacks would you like handy for after the experience? Will you need a ride home?
10) Be sure as well to get their consent and discuss a safety plan in case of emergency.
Curating the Physical Environment
Create a safe and comfortable environment that isn't just about physical safety (although that's also crucial), but also about fostering feelings of support, calm, and introspection.
Location: Choose a familiar and private location. A home, a quiet room, somewhere in nature (where there is also some kind of accessible way to go to the bathroom), somewhere they feel at ease. It would be better if no one unknown is coming in and out of the space.
Aesthetics: Think soft lighting, comfortable seating, blankets, pillows, artwork that inspires calm or wonder.
Sound: Prepare a playlist of music that they enjoy and that is calming, grounding, and ideally doesn't have lyrics. Have headphones available, and an eye mask.
Supplies: Water, healthy snacks (fruit, nuts), a journal and pen, a comfortable blanket, a bucket (just in case they need to vomit).
Cleanliness: A tidy space makes for a clear mind.
Your Own State of Being
This is perhaps the most crucial point. You can't effectively hold space for someone else if you're not grounded and centered yourself.
Sober and Clear: This should be obvious, but it bears repeating. You need to be completely alert and present. For some or most, that means being totally sober. However, that being said, some space holders will take some of the same substance the journeyer is on to be in the same energy as them. Only do this if you are completely confident you can put aside your own trip to be present and of assistance.
Calm and Centered: Meditate, do some breathwork, practice some yoga, spend time in nature before the person's journey. Get yourself into a calm and receptive state. And put your phone away! They will sense if you're not really "there."
Open Heart: Come with an attitude of compassion, non-judgment, and a genuine desire to support their journey.
Trust Yourself: You are not a therapist, not a guru, and not a doctor. Trust your instincts. Trust that you are capable of providing the support needed. But also know your limitations. Let another friend or trusted individual know that you will be trip sitting. Having layers of support makes it safer for everyone.
Substance Awareness: Familiarize yourself with the substance they are taking, its effects, its duration, and potential risks. Knowledge is power, especially when things get challenging.
During the Journey: Holding the Space
Active Listening and the Art of Being Present: More than anything, listen. Listen deeply, without judgment, without interrupting. Pay attention not just to what they say, but to their body language, their energy, their emotions.
Take Notes: It can be helpful and a relief for them to know that you're acting as their "second brain." They may have epiphanies or other sorts of realizations during their journey. Assure them that you will write it down for them so they don't have to worry about forgetting what came up for them. This could also be very helpful during the integration phase, to look back on their notes from the journey.
Non-Verbal Communication: Often, the most profound communication happens without words. Be attuned to their needs through their body language.
Say as Little as Possible: Reassure them that whatever they're experiencing is normal, and if necessary, try to reflect back what you hear without adding your own interpretation. However, best to just listen, without engaging too much from your end at all. If necessary, validate and acknowledge their feelings, even if you don't understand them.
Offering Reassurance: The Power of Grounding
Psychedelic experiences can be intense, disorienting, and sometimes frightening. Your role is to provide a sense of grounding, of safety, of reassurance.
Verbal Grounding: Remind them of the basics. "You're safe. You're in a safe place. You've taken \[substance name], and this is the effect of it. It will pass."
Physical Grounding: Offer a gentle touch (if they are open to it), a warm blanket, a cup of tea. Help them connect with their body and their surroundings.
Sensory Grounding: Engage their senses. Play calming music, offer a comforting scent (like lavender or essential oils), guide them through a mindful breathing exercise.
Navigating Challenging Psychedelic Moments
Not every trip is smooth sailing. Difficult emotions, challenging memories, or feelings of anxiety can arise. This is where your role as a space-holder becomes even more critical.
Avoid Resisting: Don't try to stop or control the experience. Resistance often intensifies the challenge. Instead, encourage them to surrender, to accept, to "ride the wave."
Change of Scenery: A simple change of environment can sometimes shift the energy. Move to a different room, go outside for a walk, or even just change the lighting or music.
Offer Distraction: Sometimes, a gentle distraction can help interrupt a negative thought pattern. Play a soothing song, light some incense, read a comforting poem, or look at a beautiful piece of art. But avoid anything that could be triggering or overwhelming.
"Set and Setting" Reset: Gently reminding them of their intentions for the trip, that they are in a safe space, that they took a substance, and that you are there to help them can offer a shift.
Trust the Process: Letting Go of Control
Ultimately, the psychedelic experience is deeply personal and unique. Your role is not to direct it, but to facilitate it.
Trust the Inner Healer: Believe in their capacity for self-healing and self-discovery. Trust that their psyche knows what it needs to explore.
Resist the Urge to "Fix": Don't try to solve their problems or give them advice. Your role is to listen, to support, and to create a safe space for them to process their own insights.
Be a Witness, Not a Director: Let them lead the way. Follow their cues. Trust that they are on the right path, even if it doesn't look like it to you.
After the Journey: Integration & Reflection
The acute effects of the psychedelic substance are only part of the process, only part of the psychedelic experience as a whole. The real work begins with integration: making sense of the experience, incorporating its insights into daily life, and creating lasting change.
Debriefing: Encourage them to talk about their experience. Ask open-ended questions:
What from the experience is still most alive for you right now?
What was the most significant thing that happened?
What did you learn?
What are you feeling now?
Are there any changes you think you want to make in light of your insights?
Do you have a sense of how to go about making these changes in your integration phase?
Journaling: Writing down their thoughts and feelings can help them process the experience and identify key takeaways.
Creative Expression: Art, music, dance, or any other form of creative expression can be powerful tools for integrating the experience on an embodied, somatic level.
Self-Care: Encourage them to prioritize self-care in the days and weeks following the trip. This includes healthy eating, restful sleep, time in nature, and connecting with supportive people.
Professional Support: If they are struggling to integrate the experience or are experiencing persistent negative effects, encourage them to seek professional help from a therapist or counselor with experience in psychedelic integration.
Ethical Considerations: Boundaries & Responsibilities
Trip sitting is not without its ethical considerations. It's important to be aware of your boundaries and responsibilities.
Confidentiality: What they share with you during the experience is private and confidential.
Non-Judgment: Create a safe space for them to explore their thoughts and feelings without fear of judgment.
Avoid Dual Roles: It's best to avoid being a trip sitter for someone you're in a romantic relationship with, or someone with whom you have a complex or unequal power dynamic.
Know Your Limits: Don't take on more than you can handle. If you're feeling overwhelmed or out of your depth, it's okay to ask for help.
Emergency Preparedness: Know how to access emergency medical care if needed. Have a list of emergency contacts readily available.
Sacred Trust
Holding space for someone on a psychedelic journey is a profound act of service. It's about being present, compassionate, and trusting in their innate capacity for healing and growth. It's about witnessing their journey with an open heart and a steady hand.
Remember, you are not there to control the experience, but to facilitate it. You are not there to fix them, but to support them. You are there to hold space for them to explore the depths of their own being. Treat this role with the respect and reverence it deserves. It is a sacred trust, a gift of presence and compassion.
Madison Margolin is a journalist and educator who cofounded the psychedelic magazine DoubleBlind. She is the author of Exile and Ecstasy: Growing up with Ram Dass and Coming of Age in the Jewish Psychedelic Underground. Her writing has been featured in outlets like Rolling Stone, VICE, and Playboy.
